Well, Lucy was a great housemate all right.
And a lousy cop.
Is that all you have to say for her?
She was some kind of a dog... What does it matter what you say about...uh...people?
Buddy, did you just finagle me into reenacting the last scene of 'Touch of Evil' with you? Badly? And you were playing the Marlene Dietrich role?
I'm feeling noirish today.
Like an aging German chanteuse?
Never mind that. Look at how Hitchcockian I look on Dog's old bed.
Heartbreaking is the word for it, Buddy. Tell your readers that the only reason we put the beds out again was that you kept laying on the floor in the empty spaces where Lucy used sleep, staring forelornly at the walls.
Yes, well, look at how that worked for me, the Woman. I'm sleeping on a Tempurpedic dog bed, for God's sake. I believe I can get anything I want from you and the Man if I try hard enough. Watch this.
Oh, Dog! Oh, beloved, ox-like Dog! How I miss you! All of the tunafish in all of the pantries in the land won't cure my melancholy!
Yeah, nice try there, Buddy. I'm not falling for that one again. For the third time. This week.
I, ummm, I like your hair, the Woman.
Why, thank you, Buddy! When I got it cut yesterday, I was worried that it ended up too short, but...hey, wait a second. Dammit! I'm not falling for that one again, either.