Wednesday, October 03, 2007

The Classic

How I Get From There to Here - Moving Edition

My brother Big Guy's truck. Oh, where to start?

Big Guy lent us his truck for the next couple of months so that we can move supplies and boxes to our new house. The truck, a GMC Sierra Classic stepside, has already helped us out by allowing us to purchase and move a dishwasher, six sheets of drywall, a ladder and a few boxes. We plan to load it up again tonight and move some smaller furniture over so that we don't have to cram it into the 24' truck on Saturday. The Classic? Proving its worth.

On the downside, The Classic has little-to-no weatherstripping around the windows. That incident with the ankle socks in the window a couple of weeks ago? Yep, that was in The Classic. The rear window is limo-tinted, and because this means you can't see out of it anyway, there's been no hurry to replace the rearview mirror. The doors have to be slammed shut with great force, throwing the side mirrors out of alignment. You cannot roll down the windows to adjust them, because the windows will not necessarily roll back up again. Open door, fix mirror, close door, knock mirror to an angle where all you can see is the door handle or the ground. The result is that, most of the time, Accountant Boy is driving blind. We asked Big Guy about these things, and he said, "I'm all about looking ahead. I don't look back, man." He chuckled good-naturedly, only half-kidding.

Why is A.B. the only one driving The Classic? That'd be on account of the steering, which is, let's euphemistically say, liberal. "It's like I'm pretend driving, like a Fisher-Price car!" he said as he turned the wheel twenty degrees in either direction while rolling straight down the road. "By the way, honey, you cannot EVER drive this truck. I love you too much to let you do it."

It also spews noxious exhaust fumes, long after the engine is turned off. We parked it in the garage to unload some stuff without disturbing our neighbors, and I went inside for a few minutes. When I opened the utility room door, I was assaulted by the smell.

"Honey, the garage door!"


"OPEN the garage door and MOVE THE TRUCK before you inadvertently kill yourself!"


For all of its faults, The Classic really has been great this week. Without it, we'd be struggling to rent the Home Depot trucks, or coordinating deliveries of every single thing that we've bought that can't be shoved through the rear door of our 2002 VW Passats. It has a new stereo, and when we're driving slowly enough to hear it over the wind noise, it's a rockin' system. We only keep one CD in it - a disc Big Guy labeled 'Pete's Mix'. Of everyone we know, only my brothers and his own family call Accountant Boy 'Pete'. Nobody else does, just like nobody ever shortens my name to Sue. He never corrects them, maybe because he doesn't want to upset the sense of brotherly camaraderie. Anyway, 'Pete's Mix' - it's got some old Black Sabbath, a Godsmack song, and Rush's '2112'.

"I think he got confused when we were burning CD's. This one's his."

"Oh, c'mon, Pete. You know you love Geddy Lee. Sing along! 'Weee aaahrre the prieests...'"

"I can't. I might pull something important and dear to me."

FamilyBanana's going through a rough patch right now. DaddyBanana isn't doing well, and Big Guy's taking it pretty hard. I like to think that A.B. and I taking The Classic on an extended road trip makes him happy when he thinks about it.

On that topic, we've got a lot going on in SuzannaBananaLand right now. We're moving for the first time in almost a decade, DaddyBanana's health is failing, my job is...weird, and I feel like everything in my life has been thrown into disarray, like a deck of cards hurled into the air. There is more than a slight possibility that I'll miss some blogstalk posts over the next couple of months. We'll see how the cards fall.


The Kelly Green Rogue said...

sorry to hear things aren't going so well in some areas.

Congrats on moving and the house!

Kathy Kathy Kathy said...

Yes. I had a car with steering like that. If you can still drive it on the freeway, what the hay?

Eryn said...

I'm giggling at the fact that he loves you too much to let YOU drive it, but has no problem risking himself. Men are so silly!

Bad Amy said...

Fantastic truck! My van doesn't have a mirror either - we live on the edge.

Georgiann said...

That's a truck with a lot of character! I learned to drive a standard transmission in a truck with questionable steering --keeps you on your toes!
Sending you good thoughts -- hoping all your cards land face-up.

Batty said...

Lots of good vibes to you and your family. You've got all sorts of life changes going on!