Regrets, I've Had a Few

I remember taking this picture. I know why I look so sad. I was trying to get a good shot of KristaBella, my hybridized White Lies Shaped Lace Tee. I'd had it finished for a couple of weeks, but I wasn't happy with it. I didn't like the way the cotton looked on me, I didn't like the length, and I didn't like the sleeves. I knew I wouldn't, even as I was knitting it. I regretted continuing on with the project.

I also regretted dropping out of the gym routine. I'd lost it, just completely lost it after the half-year mark for obvious reasons. It was a tough few months. Even so, I remember thinking, "Maybe I'd like this sweater more if I were ten pounds leaner. I screwed up and made the waist shaping too shallow, but maybe that wouldn't matter if I actually narrowed at the waist. Maybe it'd drape better."

I knew I was going to regret leaving that kitchen. Daisy, Falstaff and The Wolf are doing a fantastic job of keeping it beautiful, but I sure do wish it were still mine. I felt that way as I ran around the tripod to pose for this shot.

So that look you're seeing on my face? That's deep, aching regret.

All of that aside, it didn't come out too badly. It's a pretty, summery sweater. It's a nice fit, and it blocked beautifully. It turns out that this just isn't my style. When I wear it, I don't feel pretty or summery. I feel like a nouveau-bohemian Cal student. Oh, don't even get me started on Cal. Why the hell do they get to call themselves Cal, anyway? There are many universities in California. I went to two of them. Neither of my schools got to call themselves 'Cal'. What the Hell? And don't give me that "they were the first one" crap, either, because I don't give a good goddamn. Cal my ass. I don't particularly like Stanford, either, but I cheer heartily for them during every game they play against Cal. There's no explanation for it, really. I just hate Cal. So this sweater makes me irrationally angry when I wear it. Perhaps I should donate it or swap it away...


Details Section
The details are fuzzy, because it's been a while, and...ah, who the Hell cares?

Pattern
Krista/Bella/Shaped Lace Tee from White Lies Designs.

Yarn and Notions
Cotton yarn from an old White Lies kit. It'd been in my stash for almost three years. I think it might have been Cascade Alpine. I could probably figure out how much I used and figure out how much I have left, but whatever. If you look at Joan's patterns, you'll get accurate yardage requirements.

The kit came with these lovely acrylic leaves for the ties. They're really the only reason I kept going.


Needles
Brittany. I don't remember the exact size. I think it might have been US 8s.

Size
34" or 35", I think. I figured it was cotton and it would stretch, so that's the most logical guess I can make.

Time
Summer 2007.

Modifications
Too many to list. I took the parts of Bella that I liked, combined them with the gauge and sizing of Krista/SLT, and came up with this.

Conclusions
I don't like knitting with cotton. I miss my old kitchen. I hate Cal.


About Lucy

Thanks, everyone, for your sympathy. A.B. and I are alright. We had so many good years with Lucy, and she was so full of joy every single day, that we've been able to move right to reminiscing about her. We're past most of our grief. I believe that grief is often mistaken for regret. "I wish I'd..." "Now I'll never get a chance to..." "If only I'd..." I don't regret one single thing about our time with Lucy. A.B. and I know that we did the best we could for her, we gave her six and a half years that she wouldn't have had if we hadn't swooped in and adopted her, and we loved her unconditionally. It made it easier to make the right choice and say goodbye.

I think it's probably hardest on Buddy. His whole routine is thrown out of whack, and we know how important routine is to Buddy. I think he misses her. We didn't think that'd be a problem. We'd always assumed that he'd prefer to be our only non-human housemate. I don't know why we thought this - he'd always lived with other animals, aside from that first year we had him indoors with us - but we always believed he'd be happy by himself. The past couple of days, however, he's been wandering around downstairs and meowing. Food doesn't calm him down. Sitting him on the sofa and petting him doesn't work for very long. He still runs upstairs and throws himself on the bed next to me, but he doesn't stay there to sleep the way he did as recently as last Friday. Poor little fellow.

Well, don't tell him, but we may have something in the works to cheer him up. More on that later...

Glass Table Gator

"You guys? Hey, you guys? You know what I really like? I like you, and I like Buddy, even though he wants to claw my face off, and I like my rope, and I like you, and I really like El Pollo Loco, so I was thinking that maybe you could drop some chicken under the table, you know, if you wanted to do that, because that would make me really, really happy. By the way, this is Lucy. Umm...hi!"

Oh, such bad, bad habits we've stopped actively discouraging in her this summer. She does this thing where she gets as flat onto the floor as she possibly can be, then follows our movements with just her eyes. "Aww, but look at her! She's so cute! And she has cancer! Give her half of your dinner, just this once. We'll start making her obey again tomorrow."

Nothing new on the house front, except that the trouble in the mortgage market is holding us up. If a high tide raises all boats, the inverse is also true. This current ebb is stranding the whole fleet. Without going too far into it, I'll just say that if Accountant Boy and I can't get a reasonable rate on a home loan right now, nobody can.

I'm only an hour away from finishing the chimera that was once Shaped Lace Tee/Krista/Bella. All that's left is weaving in the ends. More on this later.

Benny and the Jets

"Here. Take it. You need it more than I do."

"What are you trying to say?"

"My hair's going to grow back. Yours...um...I love you. Look, just take the wig."


"Saturday night's alright for fightin'. Saturday night's alright, alright, ALRIIIIGHT!!!"

I love all of my cousins, but this particular bunch really shines. You give them a few drinks and suddenly there's an Elton John tribute going on in front of you. It wasn't just that he looked like Elton John with his sister's wig on his head. It was that he seemed to be imbued with the very spirit of the man. Pictures don't do it justice.

What was going on in the previous picture? I believe it was something to this effect:

Uncle Warbucks: "That one over there in the grey dress. She's a stripper."
Big Guy (laughing): "Oh yeah?!? How do you know?"
Uncle Warbucks: "He's been dicked over so many times that he only dates strippers now."
Cousin (to himself): "Nah, man...she's not a stripper. It's my sister's wedding. He wouldn't bring a stripper to my baby sister's wedding...well, maybe..."
The Engineer: "Hey, cool it. Suzanne's coming over."

I made a little progress on the Arosa sleeves yesterday, if you count making a cap sleeve that looks completely out of proportion to the rest of the sweater and starting a long sleeve that isn't going to drape especially well as progress. At least now I know that I don't want a cap sleeve, and that the long sleeve I'm making isn't the way to go. Maybe I should make the meshy sleeves.

Oh, and Sara? If that top in yesterday's post looks suspiciously like the shaped lace tee, it's because it IS the shaped lace tee. It's the only pattern in the book that's also been a single pattern for purchase. Its single-pattern name is Krista. When I bought it, I realized that it was very similar to Bella, just with a different neckline, cap sleeves and a larger gauge. I really wanted a Bella, but after knitting it too small and frogging it this winter, I couldn't bring myself to restart it. I liked the neckline of Bella more than Krista, but the gauge and waist shaping of Krista more than Bella, so I thought I'd make Krista with the Bella neckline. I've now decided that I also want longer sleeves on it. So basically, I'm making Bella with the larger gauge/fewer lace repeats.

It might be a few days before I pick either one up again, anyway. Perhaps I should start a new project. Perhaps this is what the universe is trying to tell me. Perhaps this is why Buddy decided to see me off to work this morning by regurgitating in my knitting basket.


Happy belated birthday, the Woman. - Buddy the Cat

Disgustipated

Oh, knitting. Why must you torment me so?

I had taken the past week and a half off, intending to relax and knit. The week did not go exactly as planned, with the doggy chemotherapy and the unpredictable weeping interrupting my hours of enjoyment, but yet I was hopeful. Arosa was only two sleeves away from being finished, and Bella was going to be done in a record-breaking four days. At least, I reasoned, I'd have something to show for my vacation.

What went awry? Why am I less than enthused, with only hours left of my vacation? Notice that neither piece above has sleeves. Both need sleeves, as I have admitted and Daisy has confirmed. "Mmmmmm...yeah," she said, her face crinkling ever so slightly with distaste. "It needs something. Maybe just a cap sleeve, but definitely something."


I knew as soon as I started the Arosa sleeve, which is a *YO, K2tog* mesh for its entire length, that I wasn't going to be doing it. The yarn, so happy to be knit in stockinette, was nearly impossible to knit into that net pattern. I'm going to have to make something up to replace it.


What about the Krista with the Bella neckline, the one I'm going to start calling Kristabella? Oh, that. The sleeves, which I'm too disgusted to photograph, came out at least ten stitches too short on each edge. I ran out of stitches when I was seaming them in. I'm pretty sure I misread the pattern, and that I missed a few repeats between decrease sections. Also, it's cotton. Cotton immediately stretches across my torso and makes me look about ten pounds heavier than I am. I don't know why I keep forgetting this. I don't think it'll be a bad sweater when it's done, and it was quick enough to knit, but now I'm unmotivated to do anything with it.

So here's my dilemma. I can reknit the Kristabella sleeve, making it a 3/4 sleeve with a bell edge, and I'd probably like it. I could have it done by the end of the day. Alternatively, I can make up a sleeve for Arosa and set it in, also being done by the end of the day. My goal is to be able to wear one of them to work tomorrow. I may decide based on a coin flip.

In other news, Lucy's tolerating her chemotherapy very well. The oncologist says that she's already responding well to the drugs, and her lymph nodes are shrinking quickly. I spent last week bursting into tears every time anybody expressed sympathy or concern about the situation. It's like when you fall down, and you're O.K. until somebody comes up and asks you if you're O.K., and then you start sobbing. I'm getting better about it. It now takes a good five minutes of talking about it to get me going. How's Lucy, the happiest dog in the world, handling this? She's wagging her tail and licking anything that moves. Nothing new there. She's sleeping a lot, but she wasn't exactly an insomniac before this. We're just happy to have her around, drowsy or not. She's a few feet away from me right now, snoring softly. It's good.

I got my invitation to Ravelry last week, poked around there a little bit and really liked it, but haven't done anything at all there for myself. Maybe I'll start inputting things once I've recovered from the stress of my vacation.

Yesterday was my 37th birthday. I knit, watched 'Perry Mason', ate brie and salami sandwiches for lunch, and had a good dinner with my friends. Accountant Boy made a fantastic card for me from an old GL transaction report. (We're trying to save money, because Lucy's care has now cost more than a trip to Europe.)

Yep, those last three paragraphs gave me just enough time for to think. I'm going to go knit the Arosa sleeves.